Not me Monday!!

There's this blog that I somehow stumbled upon one day and absolutely love. She started this whole "Not me Monday" craze so I thought "What the hell. Why not give it a try?!" Surely not as cute and well written as hers... but nevertheless here's my first shot...
I did NOT wait until thirty minutes before I left for North Carolina to pack my stuff. Nope NOT me. I am so well organized and on top of things that I would have packed the night before, therefore I would have noticed that all of my funeral appropriate attire was still hanging in my closet at the ex husband's house. So then I most certainly did NOT have to go shopping for something to wear to the funeral at the last minute. This last minute shopping trip did NOT lead me to Target to the little girls' section. Where I definitely did NOT buy two skirts in a girl's size large or otherwise known as a 10-12. Because an almost 27 year old woman would NOT be caught dead buying and wearing a little girl's skirt. How embarrassing would that be? Nor would I ever throw my dad under the bus and embarrass him or anything by mentioning that he put on his suit jacket for the funeral and pulled my high school graduation program out of the pocket. NO way would I tell you that happened because that would mean he hasn't washed his one and only suit jacket since 2001 at least. Impossible! And best of all NO one's boss would ever request that they bring proof of the funeral back to work with them. And since NO boss would ever be that insensitive to someone who's grandma just died I did NOT seriously contemplate taking pictures of my grandmother's open casket and then dropping them down on her desk in front of her upon my return to work as the required proof!! I would never think evil thoughts like that. NOT me!