Right where I need to be

Not really sure what governs us... fate, God, chance, a little bit of Karma, a lot of luck... who knows really. What I do know is this. Whoever or whatever set about the chain of events this past April was right on target. I honestly feel like where I am right now is where I'm supposed to be. The same goes for Brian. Tonight he told me he was seeing someone. And how did I feel about that? Probably not the typical reaction, because I was happy for him. He needs a good girl in his life. He deserves to be happy and for now she makes him happy- that can't be a bad thing. That's why I feel like I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be... if I wasn't I don't think I could feel that way. I'm doing okay on my own and that not only suprises me but makes me happy as well. I don't feel like the same girl who just a month ago was bawling her eyes out sitting in the empty bathtub at Brian's house causing a ridiculus drama filled scene. The girl who was deathly afraid of being alone. All of the desperation and tears seem like so long ago. I feel like I'm finally in control. Like I've finally got my shit together. Right now at this point in my life I'm supposed to be alone. I need to learn how to rely only on myself... become a whole person not just somebodies other half. It's funny how life works... Brian wanted to be alone and I didn't... now I'm alone and he's not... but somehow I think we both got what we needed.